How do you feel now that Corey Haim is dead? It’s like there’s some kind of crazy Jumani-Ouija board style jinx on celebrities…their careers and addictions hanging in the balance of life and death. Now, maybe Lucas was no Duckie, but in the words of the Replacements: are you satisfied?
I’ve written about Lucas before. It’s one of the most underestimated films of the ’80s. There’s a thick line between the Haim in Lucas and the Haim in License to Drive. But I’m not going to write about that. I’m not even going to write about his best bud Corey Feldman and how epic and pre-Twilight The Lost Boys was in a grimy, Santa Cruz boardwalk ’80s vampire way. Nor will I mention the adult Haim in more recent years, bloated and addicted, eyes ablaze in VH1 specials. Yet again, we are left to stumble through a maze of child actors led down the same tunnel, a haze of toddler commercials from the ’70s where they got their start, ’80s sitcom guest spots, the movies that made them famous, and the tabloids that made their larger than life glossy Teen Beat days seem laughable.
In the case of the underdog, let’s play a game: Lucas versus Duckie. In a lip syncing dance-off, Jon Cryer (Duckie) would win, but only if he’s wearing alligator skin loafers. Cryer also gets points for his fight scene with James Spader, whom was in a Don Johnson styled linen suit. Haim gets sympathy points for being embarrassed at the pep rally and later saved by Charlie Sheen. And he redeems himself in the end for the best slow clap scene to ever be featured in a film. Both of them end up stag at the dance, without the girl, whom chooses the rich, popular hunk over them…no points awarded. Final score: tie.
Remember Corey Haim just like this.